A year later

A year ago, I got on a plane to Guatemala. The first step is always the hardest and I remember being full of nerves as I flew into Guatemala City and looked down at all the lights and all the unknowns. But after that first step, that first flight, it all just settles into a rhythm. A crazy, unpredictable, emotional roller-coaster of a rhythm. Until, you find yourself a completely different person.

And I am, completely different. Perhaps, a better way to put it is that I am more myself than before. When you take away all the external factors, both good and bad (stress, job, friends, family, income, your bed), you are left with a reality that is completely controlled and managed by YOU. That means if you are unhappy in any way, it's wholly because of you. It's in your control to change it. When you become stressed, it's obvious, based on your new, stripped-down reality, what it is that is stressing you out. Only you can make yourself happy and only you have the power to do anything about it.

You become utterly and absolutely selfish. If you don't like something, you don't do it. End of story. If you want do to something, you do. Period.

What I'm trying to say is that, over the past year of traveling, I've turned into a man. Ha!

As I look back, I look ahead. This has not just been a year-off, it's been a lifetime. I can't remember doing anything different. The feeling is very similar to some of my long-distance runs that I did when training for my marathon; at some point, you just don't know how your body will stop. When I get on my last plane home, now set for July 29th, I believe I will be starting the hardest part of my journey. Will I keep with me all that I learned during my travels? A year from now, will it all be gone? A happy ghost of a memory? Will I continue to be different, or will I slowly creep back into a routine of work and daily life, will I settle into old ways?

I hope not. I hope the lessons I have learned will be permanent additions to my life. As I have often felt over my journey, I am grateful. I am thankful to all of the people I have met and that have supported me over the past year.

So, for my last three and a half months on the road, all I know is that you never really know, you just keep going.

I found my post from the night before my travels to be just as true now as it was then:

http://scoopdumonde.blogspot.com/2008/04/night-before.html

¡Besos desde España!